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I spend a lot of time with my father. He's eccentric

Other people: Your dad is so cool. You have a funny dad . You're so lucky. Me: Uh, he's crazy, and it's not fun when your father is more childish than you, your whole life. Them: You're so negative. also... Me: I need to find a job. My dad: You could get a webcam, get on one of those porn sites, and show your tits. (this is like, the millionth time he suggested sex work as a career path for me. It's the only job he thinks women do. SIGHHHHH. I prepared and fetched food and coffee for my dad, no less than 6 times, in 3 hours. He's pouting, because I didn't make an omelette. Even though he's full and has had 3 separate types of beverage, to boot. I have been missing forks, and today I noticed that he's been licking them off and hoarding them on the end table with his hoard of napkins, ketchup packets, and plastic silverware. But this isn't plastic, and it's not clean, I give him a clean fork with every one of his snacks. ...
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I’m all lost in the supermarket, I can no longer shop happily

I’m all lost in the supermarket, I can no longer shop happily. I had to go to Walmart today. I haven’t opened a new bank account out here, so I had to load cash onto my prepaid debit card, to pay my phone bill. I had just enough cash to cover it. Dad went with me, because he wanted to return a clock that doesn’t work. I’d told him not to buy a clock because I have a few clocks that are packed and I could just hang one of those in the TV room for him, when I unpacked one. After I’d hung the new one, we discovered that if you shake it, the hands just fall to the bottom. We hadn’t realized it, right away, because I tried to hang it at 6:30. Then I took it down and hung up one of the clocks I already owned. The point is, I didn’t want to go to Walmart, but now I had to return this clock that I didn’t buy and didn’t want. I thought I could do it quickly while I went to load the money onto my debit card, then leave. We got there and I had to go fetch a motorized cart for my dad. I drove i...